Daphne Matthews
  • Blog
  • About
  • Contact

Welcome to the Gambler Series
Dark, Erotic Fiction

Who would want this as an origin story?

A story that includes attempted theft, then being forced to abandon everything that's known and familiar?  A story that includes rope, knives, and handcuffs?

Turns out, Dani Santoro is all for the second part, but she has to survive Seth's temper first. Running away with him will upend her entire life and change everything - including her name - but it may just be worth it. It may just fulfill every secret fantasy she's ever had.

You need someone to tell you what to do, and I like telling you what to do.

Can she really give him everything? Will he take it?


Series features strong themes of dubious consent, consensual non-consent, D/s, BDSM, some non-consensual assault (Aces and Spaces), and violence (Riding It Out). 

If that excites you, intrigues you, or turns you on, please proceed. Otherwise, feel free to turn back now.

​Click the images below to find each book on Amazon.


Series includes: 
Backed Into a Hand - the origin story
Aces and Spaces - sometimes one rule is too many
An Offsuited Pair - a journey into CNC romance
Riding It Out - all hell breaks loose
Ace in the Hole - Seth's side of things
Dominating the Hand ​- the conclusion
Dealer's Choice ​- standalone short novel. Dark CNC
Picture
Latest release!!

The new year has brought only tragedy to Joe Connolly. First, his sister Hannah ends her own life, then a dear friend is involved in a near-fatal car accident, and it's only February.

​2020 has to get better right?

Maybe. Enter Emily Cooper. Daughter of a prominent local chef, she shares Joe's tastes in all the right things - food, wine, kinks. She's even supportive of his asexuality. 

But will Joe's grief overpower their new relationship? And can Emily emerge from her father's shadow to pursue her own dreams? They will have to endure a year of unprecedented challenges in order to find love.


CW for extensive discussion on mental health including suicide, family drama, and all things, well, 2020.

Also features some D/s and BDSM but not as extensive as the Gambler Series. Looking for more romance and less kink? This one is for you.

Why I Don't Subscribe to SSC or RACK, etc.

1/11/2021

1 Comment

 
The Short Answer –
The terms are too vague and too easily misused.
 
The Longer Answer –
First, an explanation. The above abbreviations are meant to describe different styles of kinky play. SSC stands for Safe, Sane, and Consensual; RACK stands for Risk Aware Consensual Kink; and PRICK stands for Personal Responsibility in Consensual Kink. There are others, but these are the ones I see most often.
 
These sound good, right? Safety is important. Being aware of the risks inherent to any type of play is crucial. Taking personal responsibility for one’s actions is vital. And of course, the thing that links them all – CONSENT. Consent is key.
 
But what does any of this actually mean? What effect do these terms have on the people who use them? On how they play? On how they handle mistakes and accidents? What follows are my impressions and interpretations of each. As always, your mileage may – and likely will – vary.
 
SSC
SSC has become the fluffy bunny of kinky play. When someone proclaims that they subscribe to safe, sane, consensual play – and it is often announced in a holier-than-thou manner – what I hear is someone trying very hard to be reassuring. It’s the socially acceptable, mainstream, version of kink.
 
“We’re going to talk about everything. I’m going to use this super soft rope and make sure you’re comfortable at all times. I’m going to check in regularly, and afterward we’ll snuggle and do all the aftercare you need with a fluffy blanket and chocolate.”
 
There’s absolutely nothing wrong with any of that. Those are all good things if that’s what you enjoy. But the phrase itself always comes off as a bit condescending to me. As if safety can be ensured. As if other, valid forms of play are somehow not sane – I’ve never been able to figure out where the line is on that, by the way.
 
What I do on a random Wednesday night might look extreme to some people. That doesn’t make it less safe or sane than anything else – If I consent to it.
 
Further, what is safe? There is an inherent risk in everything we do. I don’t care how soft the rope is or how fuzzy the flogger. Safety is more than physical. Your safety measures need to take mental triggers into account too and there is no guarantee that you will avoid those altogether no matter what precautions you take.
 
RACK
When I see someone claim to be a RACK player, I see someone with a puffed-up chest intent on conveying how cool, dangerous, and edgy they are.
 
“Look at me. I can suspend someone upside down without a net because I’m AWARE of the risks involved. I don’t do any of that sissy aftercare stuff. But of course I’ll respect your limits and boundaries – probably! Haha. Just kidding. No really, come back. It was a joke!”
 
Again, knowing the risks involved – all the risks – in anything we do is crucial. Some types of play have very specific ways of mitigating those risks (go to any class on fire play, for example). If you don’t know what those are, you have no business trying that sort of play.
 
But simply being aware is not enough for me. I need more. I need to know the steps you’re taking to protect everyone involved.
 
PRICK
To me, PRICK is just RACK’s even more obnoxious, ‘roided out cousin. People who use it are the same people who are proud of how sadistic they are. They are loud about it and treat topping like a competition. Mostly, I think they just like being associated with the word.
 
But again, I want to know more about what personal responsibility means to you. What actions are you willing to take? Will you talk me through an unexpected trigger? Will you call an ambulance if I need it? And do you really think that people who don’t refer to themselves as PRICKs don’t take personal responsibility?
 
Conclusion
As is so often the case, the real key is communication. Phrases like “safe, sane, and consensual” and “risk aware” are fine as shortcuts. But I’d rather talk – in plain language – about what we are going to do and what’s going to happen after. Especially if we’ve never played before.
 
What does safety mean to you? What steps are you taking to ensure it as much as you can? What happens if and when something goes wrong? Be specific.
 
More importantly? Show me. Show me by your actions that you know what you’re doing, that you’re aware of the limitations (yours, mine, and the space we’re in). Be responsible by checking in, check up after, and preparing for the scene (before, during, and after).
 
Vague words tell me nothing. What you do in the moment – and after – tells me everything.
1 Comment
E
3/3/2022 09:22:51 am

I can agree to a lot, but just wanted to say some words about the "sane"-question. I think of sane in a more practical way: ex do not be under the influence of drugs and alcohol when in/before a BDSM-session. You have to be clear-minded.

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    Author

    Daphne Matthews is a former journalist who has been involved in various BDSM communities since 2006. But it is her lifetime of support for Cleveland sports teams that qualifies her as a True Masochist.

    Categories

    All
    Blog
    Consent
    Feminism
    Film And Television
    Kink 101
    Myths Of Kink

    Archives

    April 2023
    March 2023
    February 2023
    November 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    June 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020

    Content Warning

    The above works of fiction largely depict consensual kink/BDSM activities among adults. However, in order to reflect real-world scenarios, both Aces and Spaces and Riding it Out feature descriptions and scenes of rape/sexual assault.
     
    Also, An Offsuited Pair features the depiction of a hate crime that results in a death. In retrospect, the situation was probably unnecessary. At the time of writing, I justified it as reflecting reality. I am currently working on more positive depictions and will continue to do so in the future. 

    Finally, Dominating the Hand includes depictions of gaslighting and emotional trauma.

    RSS Feed

Proudly powered by Weebly
  • Blog
  • About
  • Contact