Backed Redux - Chapter 30

It was a good thing I’d been at my job awhile and knew what I was doing because I spent most of the next day in a trance. I couldn’t wait to get home and talk to Seth. I had been serious when I’d told him I didn’t want it to be a one off. I needed him to understand that. Of course it was an overtime day though. A late meeting meant I had to stay and make sure everything was ready and let the caterers in and out.

By the time I got home, I was almost too tired to talk about the night before and would have been happy to just put it off a day. When I knelt in front of him, Seth smiled in that deceptively sweet way that made him look much more innocent than he was. But he said nothing directly, only dismissed me so I could get myself dinner. He’d eaten without me.

I stood in the kitchen to decompress from the day, knowing that if I sat down I wouldn’t want to get back up again, even to do the few dishes that needed to be done. I was leaning on the counter with my back to the living area, mentally checking off what remained on my to-do list before bed when he came in and stood across from me.

“I know you’re overthinking last night,” he said with a small grin.

“Actually, I’ve just been reliving the good parts all day,” I said. “And by good parts, I mean all of it.”
He bridged the distance between us and kissed me gently. His kiss was almost as deceptive as his smile, sweet but a mask for so much more.

​“I’ve been thinking too, and this is how things are going to go,” he said. “When I want you, I will come to you. You may or may not have advance warning. You will also keep the toybag in your room near the bed, and your bedside table will stay stocked with lubes and condoms along with a few other basic toys – clothespins, slappers, that sort of thing. Is that clear?”

Oh god yes, I thought. Out loud, I said, “Yes, Sir – but what about the times in between?”

“That’s up to you. I’m not interested in dictating your orgasms if I’m not there, though I may be rethinking that,” he said with a wink. “Just keep in mind that I might come for you at any time.” He paused as he let that last statement sink in. “Also – and this is important – asking for sex will lead to me limiting both your orgasms and the frequency of my visits. Is that also clear?”

“Crystal, Sir,” I said. I continued hesitantly. “But there is one thing that sort of bothered me. It’s been on my mind all day.”

“What is it?” he asked.

I squirmed. Maybe it wasn’t that big of a deal after all. Maybe I should have just let it go and ignored it. We were in a good place and I was happy. Did I really want to risk disturbing that? Yes,

I did.

“Well, maybe I should have brought it up before, but I didn’t think about it,” I said. “Honestly, it’s not something I usually think about at all.”

He raised an eyebrow in a silent question that meant I needed to get on with it.

“I’m not usually a fan of being slapped,” I said finally. “And when you’ve done it before, it was in anger. And well, I’m pretty sure that’s not how you meant it last night but even weirder is that I really didn’t mind—it was okay.” I finally took a breath. “Shit – am I making sense?”

He smiled down at me. “Yes, you’re making sense. And you’re right, I wasn’t angry – I was trying to emphasize a point and make sure I had your focus.”

I stared at the floor. “You definitely had my attention – before and after. I think I’m mainly confused by my reaction. I’ve never even come close to enjoying that and I’m not sure why it was okay from you.”

“Heat of the moment, maybe,” he said. “I won’t make it a regular thing though. Unless you’d rather cut it out all together?”

Still staring at the floor, I started fidgeting with my sweater. “I don’t know – there are ways of getting my attention that are just as effective but if –”

He grabbed my hands and held them against the counter behind me.  Finally, I looked up at him. “Talk to me – tell me what’s okay here.”

 I didn’t want to spell this out. Not yet. The truth was that I still wasn’t sure. But the fact that he asked … goddamn, that was sexy. I spoke quietly, almost in a whisper. “I guess it can be a sometimes thing.”

He stepped back and crossed his arms over his chest. “You guess? Since when are you so afraid to speak your mind? This isn’t a deal breaker for me and if you don’t want it repeated, it won’t be.”
“It’s just – I didn’t want this to be awkward and now it is,” I said. “I’m kind of sorry I brought it up.”
He approached again and wrapped his arms around me. “Don’t be sorry,” he said. He held me for a minute, while I breathed deeply and willed myself to believe it really was okay. “Feel better?” he asked. 

“Actually, I do,” I answered.

“Good,” he said as he stepped back again. “So aside from the obvious distractions, how was the rest of your day?”

I relayed a few of the specifics and shared a little gossip but I still had more questions. “What will Julie think of all this?” I asked.

“She’ll be okay,” he said. “She sees other people too.”

Suddenly, our little web of lovers seemed huge. I knew Chloe had at least one other regular lover besides Justin, though she had assured me that they were both disease free. And who knew how many other people Julie was seeing. “Sounds like it’s time to start testing regularly again,” I said.

“Good thinking,” Seth answered.

There was one more question I couldn’t let go of though. “By the way,” I said. “How long had you been thinking of … that is, did you have last night planned? I mean, it didn’t exactly feel rehearsed but it didn’t feel entirely spontaneous either – it’s like you’d had it in mind for awhile.”

Seth just grinned and kissed me on the forehead. “Let’s just say you’re not the only one who can overthink things,” he said as he walked away. As I started to clean up, I couldn’t help smiling too. I was excited by the possibilities and looked forward to sharing with Chloe how our threesomes had led to changes at home. I hoped she’d be happy. And while it had taken a huge gamble on my part to get things going, Seth had firmly retained control.